Since you are about to
become an “official” resident of our fair province, here’s an old piece
of email that keeps coming around and around …. I promise I will not
send any more.
If you consider it a sport to gather your
food by drilling through 36 inches of ice and sitting there all day
hoping that the food will swim by, you live in Ontario.
If you're proud that your region makes the
national news 96 nights each year because Wawa is the coldest spot in
the nation, you live in Ontario.
If your local Dairy Queen is closed from
September through May, you live in Ontario.
If you instinctively walk like a penguin
for six months out of the year, you live in Ontario.
If your dad's suntan stops at a line
curving around the middle of his forehead, you live in Ontario.
If you have worn shorts and a parka at the
same time, you live in Ontario.
If you have had a lengthy telephone
conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you live in
YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE Ontarian :
1. "Vacation" means going South past
London for the weekend.
2. You measure distance in hours.
3. You know several people who have hit a
deer more than once.
4. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C"
in the same day and then back again.
5. You can drive 110 kph through 2 feet of
snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching.
6. You design your kid's Halloween costume
to fit over a snowsuit.
7. Driving is better in the winter because
the potholes are filled with snow.
8. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter,
winter, still winter and road construction.
9. Your idea of creative landscaping is a
statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.
10. Down South to you means London.
11. Your 1st of July picnic was moved
indoors due to frost.
12. You have more miles on your snow
blower than your car.
13. You find 0 degrees "a little chilly."
14. You actually understand these jokes,
and you forward them to all your Ontario friends.